Foster care

Dealing with Discrimination During Adoption

The adoption process can be exciting and rewarding when families are able to add a new member to their homes. However, some adoption agencies are placing limits on the individuals who are able to even apply for adoption, and this is discrimination, whether the limits are based on lifestyle, race, or marital status.

There are several groups that exist to help fight these discriminative practices and give a voice to those who wish to adopt a child but are unable to find an agency that will work with them. In March of 2011, a bill was introduced that emphasizes that every child needs and deserves a family. This bill is part of a series of federal acts designed to protect gay, lesbian, and transgender individuals who wish to add children to their families. There are hundreds of thousands of children in foster care, just waiting for a family to be part of, and denying the privilege of adoption to someone based on lifestyle choices or orientation is simply unfair.

The United States Department of Health and Human Services enacted the Multiethnic Placement Act in 1997. This act prohibits the denial or delay of adoptive or foster care families based on color or race. If a person deems that an agency is discriminating based on these criteria, there are financial penalties that can be forced upon the agency. Finding civil attorneys to help fight against this discrimination can help put a stop to unfair practices. Learning more about the process of adoption can be overwhelming, but it will certainly pay off in the end for those excited about the prospect of adding to their family.

Filed Under: Adoption, Family Life Tagged With: Adoption, Family, Foster care

Adoption Types – Special Needs Adoption

There are many great kids out there with special needs that need and deserve a loving home just like all other kids. Typically, special needs children are harder to place in a permanent home because of their need for special help due to a disability of some sort. But, over the past few decades, more and more people are opening up their homes to children with special needs. A child with special needs can be an infant, or any age up through 18 years old. The majority of special needs children looking for a forever home are in the public foster care system, and many have moved through several different homes. This can lead to the child having more issues than other children that do not have special needs.

The term special needs is defined differently when talking about adoption, than what most people understand the term to mean. A child with special needs usually needs special educational services or has some sort of disability. When talking about adoption, a child with special needs can be a child with health problems, is part of a minority group, has emotional problems, has siblings that need to be adopted together, has a history of abuse or neglect, are older, or has been exposed to alcohol or drugs. Each state has a different opinion as to what constitutes a special needs child.

Some agencies will require potential adoptive parents to meet certain requirements to be eligible to adopt a special needs child. This could a certain age requirement, marital status, length of marriage, and proven commitment and preparation to properly care for and love a special needs child.

Filed Under: Adoption Tagged With: Adoption, Foster care, Special education

Adoption Types – Closed Adoption

Closed adoption is becoming a thing of the past, with the only few places it is still practiced is when adopting internationally or adopting through the foster care system. This form of adoption should not be confused with sealed records, which isn’t a type of adoption but more of a practice that can be used in any form of adoption.

When a person is looking at closed adoption, they are looking to have no contact between the biological and the adopted families. Many children don’t even know they are adopted when their parents went through a closed adoption process. Or, the children don’t know they are adopted until they are older and their adoptive parents feel they can handle the information.

In a closed adoption, the child’s placement is typically chosen by adoption professionals. Adoption professions will match a child with an adoptive family for a closed-adoption no matter if it is a domestic, international, or foster adoption. When the adopted child reaches the age of majority in your state, they are legally allowed to search for their birth parents and their birth parents have the ability to search for them. Adoption agreements only stay in force until the child reaches the legal age that she or he can make their own decisions.

Closed adoptions are regulated by state laws, so be sure to familiarize yourself with the adoption laws in your state. Sometimes there are post-adoption contact agreements involved in a closed adoption, but they may not be legally binding in your state. Don’t forget that if you are adopting a child from out of state, you also have to comply with the laws of that state also. Doing research will ensure that you are familiar with the adoption process, you are familiar with the laws and regulations, and you will know what to expect on the journey to becoming an adoptive parent.

Filed Under: Adoption Tagged With: Adoption, Foster care, Parent

The Home Visit Before the Adoption

: Image by Chris and Jenni via Flickr

One of the most nerve-racking events that occurs during the adoption process is the at-home visit. Almost every adoption agency requires that an at-home visitation be conducted before the adoption can be finalized and the adopted child and couple can meet each other. It is usually during this time that adoptions are finalized or denied, making it a very important time for families.

One of the things that can be done to make home visits less stressful is to know exactly what will be looked at during that time. Here is a look at some of the items that will be looked at during the home visits by an adoption agency.

Finances. The adoption agency wants to make sure they are placing the child in a safe and financially secure home. They will want to look at bank records, savings accounts and tax forms. They will also want to know if you’ve ever considered bankruptcy. Even though they are looking at what you present to them they will most likely have done their own investigation so there is no point in trying to lie if you contacted several Detroit bankruptcy lawyers, for example, because the adoption agency will know.

Household situation. The at-home visit also will evaluate your household situation. Adoption workers will look to make sure there is enough room for the child, does the child have their own room, places to play and other items. This is one of the factors that most adoption agencies seriously take into account when deciding to finalize an adoption.

Knowing a little bit about what the adoption agency is looking for can help relieve some of the stress that an adopted couple has when they are trying to have an adoption finalized.

Filed Under: Adoption, Family Life Tagged With: Adoption, Detroit, Foster care

The Origins of Adoption and Family Life in America

The origins of adoption in the United States date back to the American Civil War. The effect of rapid immigration and children that had been orphaned created a big problem in the U.S. A protestant minister by the name of Charles Loring Brace became highly enraged by the number of vagrant children wandering the streets of New York.

Orphans As a Result of the Civil War

He believed that the large numbers of orphaned children presented a threat to the family life of everyone, so he started a movement known as the Orphan Train. These trains shipped approximately 200,000 children from the eastern parts of the U.S. to other areas around the country. These children became indentured servants to the families that brought them into their homes. This was a far cry from adoption, but it was one early solution to a pressing problem.

Orphan Train Movement

This movement was large, and abuses of this new system occurred. Children were being mistreated and abused under this indentured arrangement. In 1917, Minnesota became one of the first states to put laws into place to protect these children. These laws were the first adoption laws that actually governed the type of family life that these children were entitled to in a family.

Progressive Movement

Similarly, a Progressive movement began sweeping through the U.S. The President, Theodore Roosevelt, called a conference on the care of dependent children. Unfortunately, more than 98% of orphaned children were in foster homes by 1923. A mere 2% had gone through the adoption process and had some semblance of a normal family life. By the year 1970, adoptions were at their highest in the United States. After this time period, the number of adoptions began to decline.

Sociologists contribute the decline to a variety of factors. For instance, the advent of birth control in the 1950â€™s resulted in less unwanted pregnancies. Some contribute the legalization of abortion as one factor in the decline of adoption in the U.S. Regardless of the reason, today, America still has millions of kids awaiting a stable family life, so adoption is still a very necessary process in our nation.

Filed Under: Adoption Tagged With: Adoption, Charles Loring Brace, Foster care, New York, Orphan, Orphan Train, Theodore Roosevelt, United States

Adoption and Parents Instilling Character in Children

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Adoption gives millions of kids the family life that they need and deserve. All human beings have a need to belong to a family. In fact, the family is the most fundamental unit in shaping a personâ€™s character. Who we become as adults is strongly linked to how we were raised.

Character is the most important part of a personâ€™s makeup. Character can be defined as who you are when there is no one else looking at you. Parents are the most powerful source of a childâ€™s character. Life lessons also play a big part in the process. Families that decide on adoption have an opportunity to shape another human beingâ€™s character for life. The impact can be positive or negative. The daily family life that a child experiences helps to develop the childâ€™s character.

The Decline of Character in America

Sadly, character is truly lacking in our American society. People are more likely today to harm another to achieve personal fulfillment or reap personal gain. This is quite unfortunate; however, families that adopt have a chance to make a difference in the lives of children. There is no magic parenting formula that will guarantee a perfect child. In fact, no perfect people exist anyway. However, a strong character will take a person a long way.

Shaping the Character of Children

Character is modeled by parents. The old clichÃ© of do as I say does not hold water these days. Therefore, parents must hold their own behavior to a higher standard to instill good character in children. Children are watching all the time. Adoptive parents have the same responsibility as any other parent; they must parent responsibly. Many adults are sitting in jail or prison cells because of poor parenting or no parenting. This is not always the case, but it is certainly the scenario in many situations.

Parenting is arguably the most important job in the world. There is no other job that shapes our communities, cities, states, and nations like parenting. Choosing to be an adoptive parent is honorable, and it is one of the hardest and most rewarding experiences a family will under take.

Filed Under: International Adoption Tagged With: Adoption, Child, Facilitators, Family, Foster care, Home, Parent, United States

Adopting Internationally

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The reasons for considering adoption are many. Perhaps you and your spouse have tried for years to conceive with no luck — or you have conceived, but keep having miscarriages. Whatever the reason, you have decided that adoption may be the best route to having the child and family of which you have always dreamed.

You will have many things to consider when adopting — one of which is from where would you like to adopt a child? While there are many children in the United States who need families, think about adopting a child from another country, where poverty is more widespread than in the United States, and families less able to care for their children.

In China for instance, girl babies need families desperately. Since couples are only allowed to have one child, many who give birth to a girl baby decide they do not want her and leave her on the steps of the nearest orphanage or hospital. These beautiful girls are taken to a crowded orphanage and may find a foster mother to care for them until they are adopted — or they may not. In the villages of China, these foster babies are carried on the backs of their foster mothers as the women toil in the rice fields alongside the water buffalo.

The families in China are overjoyed when one of these baby girls is adopted by an American family because they know that their native children will be loved and cared for in ways they unfortunately cannot provide right now. When a group of parents from the United States is strolling their new babies around their village or city of origin, the Chinese people will come up to them and laugh and smile and pat the babies’ hands. They know these girls are lucky to have found good homes.

China is just one country from which you may adopt. There are many others — Russia, Belarus, Lithuania, Armenia to name a few. Listen closely, and you will learn that each has its own story. One may be speak to your heart.

Filed Under: Adoption, International Adoption Tagged With: Adoption, Family, Foster care

Donating to Adoption Agencies

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You don’t necessarily have to adopt a child to help adoption agencies. Many adoption agencies operate on extremely small budgets. There are simply more children than they can find homes for. This creates a financial burden that can make it difficult for them to operate within their budgets, especially during difficult economic times. Donating to an adoption agency in your area or elsewhere can help them make ends meet and provide loving homes to needy children.

Donating Clothing to Adoption Agencies

When donating clothing to an adoption agency, try to choose kid-appropriate items that will make children feel great about themselves. You might prefer a pair of Apple Bottoms, but the kids just need something simple that keeps them warm and comfortable. Although you might think that your old designer brands are best, sometimes these articles of clothing create rifts within the agency. More often than not, adoption agencies want to provide reasonable clothes to their children; not something fashionable or flashy. Certainly nothing risqué.

Donating Goods to Adoption Agencies

Adoption agencies also need goods such as diapers, toys and towels. If you want to help a specific organization, then contact them to find out what items they need most. That way you can fill a legitimate need.

Donating Money to Adoption Agencies

Many adoption agencies and foster homes accept donations. Before you donate your money, though, you should do a bit of research to make sure that they provide adequate care to the children. You might feel that adoption agencies in poor countries need your money most, but it is very hard to determine whether those organizations use the money to benefit the children. It is, therefore, often best to keep the money within your country. That way you know that the money is spent legally.

Filed Under: Adoption, Children Tagged With: Adoption, Apple Bottoms, Foster care

Adoption Options

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You have made the decision to adopt. Now you must research the plethora of options to determine the right path for you. While the myriad adoption choices may seem overwhelming, take a deep breath and get started on your research.

If you want an open adoption — where the child has contact with the birth parent(s) –, then you may want to consider adopting from within the United States. This is also a good option if you prefer a newborn infant. You can go through one of the 15,000 agencies in the U.S. that handle domestic placements, or through a private adoption lawyer. Usually, you will meet the birth parents and often, the child will be placed with you immediately after the baby is born. Cost can be up to $30,000. One caveat is that in a domestic adoption, the birth parents may change their mind about putting their baby up for adoption.

Adopting internationally is another option — many youngsters from various developing countries are in need of homes. If you choose this route, you will most likely go through an agency based in the United States. An agency will help you navigate the maze of international laws and policies for adopting and provide emotional support. Cost can be up to $35,000, which includes travel to the child’s country. Most countries require the adoptive parent to pick up the child from the country of origin.

If you don’t mind adopting an older child — nine or older — than consider adopting a child who is in the foster care system. These children are waiting for good homes. State agencies work to place the children. Cost is up to $3,500, but you will receive a federal tax credit.

No matter which option you choose, prepare yourself for a homestudy. This comprehensive document approves you and your family for adoption and includes every small detail about your life. You will be asked for personal references, if you have a criminal record, health issues, and even how you feel about adopting. A social worker will conduct the evaluation, which costs up to $3,000.

While all this may seem daunting, it will be worth it in the end when you hold your new child in your arms.

Filed Under: Adoption, Family Life Tagged With: Adoption, Family, Foster care, United States

Discipline and Your Newly Adopted Teenager

If you are a new parent having just adopted a teen you are probably filled with a million questions. After all, you have chosen a task that isn’t very easy to do. There is the problem you have with not having raised this child since birth. They are coming into your home with their own past and their own personalities. This means that figuring out how to discipline them can be a very difficult task. There aren’t a lot of parents who would envy your position, but it’s the job you took on and it’s the job you are going to have to figure out and figure out quickly.

The issue right from the get go is the issue of what is right and wrong. As a parent of a younger child you can instill this into them from a very young age. They will know that hitting someone, for instance, is wrong but sharing with them is right. Now, you should expect that your teenager, regardless of their background, would have a basic understanding of this concept but it’s possible that these sorts of rules of right and wrong have never been really enforced. This means that there is no concrete belief in what is right or wrong and there may have been different life circumstances to shape their belief.

The other issue may have been inconsistent ability to enforce the rules of basic morals and ethics. Many adopted children are in and out of several foster homes prior to arriving in your homes. Those in charge of these homes or services may have enforced discipline and rules in a variety of ways. You must make certain that you understand that while you might be very strict in your discipline, this child is not nearly used to be disciplined in such a way. These things can lead to gaps in how your teen will react to punishment.

Filed Under: Adoption, Children, Family Life Tagged With: Adolescence, Foster care, Parent